I was having a discussion with someone the other day about
the idea of leading vs. controlling. Do
you lead by telling everyone what to do, or do you provide guidance and then
step back?
At times I often find myself falling into the pattern of
controlling - especially since becoming a parent. We are so used to directing all aspects of
our family life and schedules that we sometimes forget it is okay to just
provide direction and allow things to happen on their own. That little controlling voice inside my head
does creep up every now and then and creates more chaos than order. For example, how many times are we attempting
to run out the door in the morning to get the kids to school on time and one of
them is not quite moving as quickly as you would like. Instead of making them responsible for their
own actions, you just pull together the homework from last night and stuff it
in the backpack at break-neck speed while grabbing their hat and gloves to
throw in the car, just to make it easier.
Instead of using these moments as a teaching tool for our children, we
just become frustrated and act like crazed lunatics. How productive is that?
Is this a pattern with your employees? Micromanaging their every move to the point
that you would just rather do the job yourself since they won't do it in the
manner you want. Or better yet, do you
find it easier to do it yourself than try to explain once again how you want it
done when they didn't get it right the first time they tried?
I believe ego plays a big role in this type of
behavior. Over the years, we have held
positions because we are good at what we do.
When we have to share these tasks with others, we become the
"all-knowing" one, the person who can perform the task better than
anyone. It is difficult to provide
guidance and take the big step back.
With our children, we want them to be able to perform a task and not
struggle. So, as the parent, we will
step in immediately when they make a mistake or have problems. It is no different with our employees. We often jump in to save the day when all
they really need is additional guidance or coaching to help them learn. As their leader, that is our job, to provide
guidance and assistance so they can thrive - not control their every move.
As a leader, do you like to pull the puppet strings?
